A New Book
Quick note: My novel, The Old Powers, is available on Amazon in Kindle or paperback format. The Old Powers is the prequel to Rites of Glory, so if you’re curious about the histories of the characters, it will fill out your understanding. These are fantasy novels, but I refused to let myself be stuck in the notion that there are good guys with evil to overcome. It was much more fun to explore what motivates someone who ends up committing evil deeds, but who isn’t “bad.” The good guys are flawed as well. Aren’t we all?
Stanley’s Adventure
Stanley Berpsmog spent a lot of time in his room to escape his mean older sister, seven year old Bertha. Not that his room was all that interesting. She had already broken all his toys she could get her hands on. He lay on his stomach on his bottom sheet, having kicked all of the rest of his bedding to the floor. Now he threw his pillow on the floor too. He would have liked to punch someone. But hmmm. His bottom sheet had an interesting hole in it about the size of red grape. He stuck his finger in the hole. It was warm. No, it was hot!
Words Whose Sounds I Love
Qumquat Scissors Barf Bauble Raunchy Whoosh! Languid Kelptomaniac I’m sure you have some too. What are they?
Need a Great Grammar Course or an Editor?
Need more grammar practice? Here’s a site where you can get one-on-one instruction from a grammar expert. www.grammar-lion.com Many of you wonder if you should have a professional editor. I recommend it! Here is one who I’ve worked with who is stellar. https://www.grammar-lion.com/pages/grammar-lion-editing You’ll love her.
Rolled Oats
Some phrases just roll off the tongue. I like “rolled oats” because of the long “O” in both words. In fact it inspired me to see if I could extend it. This is good practice for poets since the sounds of words in poetry is so important. Here’s mine. You try one too. Lonesome Jones owns forty glorious rolled oat stores for those poor bores ordering s’mores.
Flyer
I waltzed out of the local grocery store, pushing a cart full of bags and shoved them in the back of my Honda Fit. I slid into the driver’s seat and then huffed in annoyance. A folded flyer was stuck under the windshield wiper. I yanked open the door, balanced on my left leg, and reached around to pull the flyer loose. I unfolded it and read the large Times New Roman bold letters: “The earth is shifting beneath you.”
“In MY day, we….”
For some reason this phrase evokes Thanksgivings as a kid when odd smelling grandparents and weird uncles came over for a big turkey dinner. It wouldn’t be long before one of them would scowl and say, “In MY day, we…” with a variety of endings. Perhaps they walked ten miles to school and back (barefoot) and thought I was a slacker because I was in a car pool. Perhaps they only had one or two books, and it infuriated them that I turned the corner of a page down to mark my place in my paperback. Or perhaps they thought my attempt to fling a pea off my spoon across the table into my sister’s big mouth would have brought on severe corporal punishment if they’d acted up at the table. Times have changed. As we become the parents and then the grandparents (though I sincerely hope I do not smell odd), I can feel this phrase wanting to rise to my lips as I watch nephews, nieces, and grandchildren do the unthinkable. “In MY day, we didn’t take phone calls during dinner, not to mention checking your cell phone and texting every two seconds.” “In MY day, we had to go out in the cold weather and hang out in the back yard to sneak a joint instead of lighting up in the house.” “In MY day, we only had one television, and if Pop wanted to watch football, we didn’t get to watch An Affair to Remember.” How would you end that phrase, “In MY day, we…”?
Never-Never Land
Never-Never Land was where Peter Pan and the Lost Boys lived. Two stars on the right and straight on until morning. I find myself using this phrase often as a place that doesn’t exist. (Example: Trump’s attorney Michael Cohen has been living in Never-Never Land.) But what if we could create our own, preferred Never-Never Land? What would it be like? Yes, this is a tricky question. The more you think about it, the more details you give it, the less it holds together. Even so, when times are tough, it would be nice to go to Never-Never Land. Take me to yours.
Fire!
Fire has so many connotations. It can be the source of warmth, a way to cook food, a lovely candle flame, a cozy crackling campfire to create camaraderie, or even the way to clear a field. The flip side is fire as the destroyer of homes, a way to scar the skin, how to burn a favorite pot, or a force that easily gets out of hand. But whether it’s left its mark in a scar, in the glory of crepes suzette, or a belly full of barbeque, fire evokes memories in all of us. Yours?
Leonard Bernstein
This is a poetry challenge. Think back to that great song in West Side Story when the women argue about whether it’s better to live in American or Puerto Rico. Sing this in your head: I like to be in America! O.K. by me in America! Ev’rything free in America For a small fee in America! Rhythmically, this is a fascinating lyric. It combines 3/3 time (waltz time for those of you who didn’t get piano lessons) and 2/2 time on the word “America.” Let me count it out for you. I like to be in A mer i ca. 1-2-3 1-2-3 1-2 1-2 1-2 Notice that all the ones are the heavy beats while the twos and threes are the weak beats. All the numbers get equal time. You can beat this out on your desk with your left hand doing the ones and your right hand doing the twos and threes. Most poetry settles for a fairly settled rhythmic pattern like iambic pentameter. You’ll find it in Shakespeare sonnets and in a line from Keats below: 2 1 2 1 2 1 2 1 2 1 To swell the gourd, and plump the hazel shells With a few variations to make the words fit the rhythm, that’s the way it is through the whole poem or sonnet: sets of 2-1s (iambic), repeated five times (pentameter). Now, along comes composer Bernstein, and he wants to mess around with the rhythm and time. He’s not the first, but he does it so well here that this becomes a song (actually the chorus) we all like without quite knowing why. So your challenge, should you choose to accept, is to either use Bernstein’s rhythm or come up with a crazy—but compelling—rhythm of your own where it is not consistent within the line but is consistent across the different lines. Your content is your own choice, whether funny, serious, or musical. I know you can do it!